What Are Emotions?
You certainly have faced your own emotions at some point. In fact, one of the most challenging aspects for each of us is precisely this confrontation. Emotions represent feelings; they encompass all the accumulated experiences we hold within ourselves. At times, we allow them to flow freely, while at other times, we strive to tame them and keep them restrained inside us.
Moreover, emotions serve as an expression of what we truly feel. However, quite often, they project something that we may not genuinely experience. This is why it becomes crucial for us to develop the ability to control them.
What Happens When We Take Action Under the Influence of Our Emotions?
We’ve all heard the phrase, “Count to 10 before you act, especially when upset.” This simple guideline is crucial, yet we often struggle to apply it.
The reason lies in our humanity. We all have weaknesses, and that’s a fact.
Perhaps you’ve found yourself saying or doing something based on your emotions, only to realize it was the wrong move. It may have even worked against you.
When we feel triggered, we often make our worst impulsive choices. These choices may not even reflect our true selves; they can be projections of unresolved emotions. The reasons behind these feelings can vary widely, usually reflecting the dynamics of our relationships. You might say something thoughtless that you don’t genuinely mean, leading to an unpleasant outcome that escalates into a major argument. Just one word can destroy something you’ve poured your heart into and deeply care about.
The Importance of Being Able to Control Our Emotions
Controlling our emotions is perhaps one of the most challenging tasks we face. Throughout life, we learn this skill. When we’re younger, we often struggle to manage our emotions and dive headfirst into situations. As we grow, we gradually discover ways to harness our feelings better.
Yet, because emotions are among the most complex aspects of being human, controlling them is far from easy. Mastering this skill becomes an art and a journey for each of us. Unfortunately, when we lack this control, we risk losing many valuable people and things in our lives.
We cannot turn back time. Thus, when something happens because of our emotional misjudgment, we often feel deep regret. We may find ourselves trapped in cycles of blame and uncertainty. At times, it proves incredibly difficult to escape this state, and we might even give in to another negative emotion. This is why it’s crucial for us to maintain control over our emotions.
In What Situations Can We Find Ourselves When We Succumb to Our Emotions?
Imagine you’re having a terrible day. We all have those sometimes. You encounter people you’d rather avoid, yet in certain situations, you must interact with them. You absorb their negativity, and soon, nothing seems to go your way. Suddenly, you reach a breaking point! In these moments, we often unleash our frustrations on our closest and most important people.
Under the weight of accumulated negativity, we might do something completely out of character. Unfortunately, this can cost us dearly.
Alternatively, picture this: you feel incredibly happy and on top of the world. Everything appears perfect! In such moments, we tend to make impulsive choices that are also uncharacteristic for us—for example, buying a ticket and deciding to travel without properly planning the details or location.
Regardless of the emotions we experience, it’s crucial for us to learn how to control them effectively.
How to Control Our Emotions?
No one ever said it would be easy. I, too, am still learning how to manage my emotions, and it takes a lot of effort. However, there are several strategies I strive to implement:
First, I try to understand why I feel the way I do. Analyzing my feelings helps me identify the root causes. There is always a reason behind our emotions, even when we aren’t in the right. Therefore, make an effort to understand yourself better.
Additionally, I refuse to blame myself! No matter how challenging it is, I do my best to avoid self-blame. Why? Because blaming ourselves can be detrimental. When we self-criticize, we risk spiraling into a negative state, which does not benefit us at all. Remember, every action has an opposite reaction; this is a fact. So, do not punish yourself.
Moreover, write it down! When you find yourself in a similar situation, try documenting your emotions in a notebook or on your computer. However, keep this to yourself and refrain from sharing these feelings. By doing so, you can avoid making many mistakes in the future. And never share your emotions in a chat, especially with someone you value greatly. Keep your phone away when you are under emotional stress.
Consider meditating. Simply step back from everything and everyone, and focus on your breath. Try to clear your mind and avoid overthinking. The more we dwell on our thoughts, the more we fuel our emotions. Maintaining balance is crucial for emotional mastery. Even do some of your favourite activity – for me this is Yoga.
Allow yourself to experience your emotions, but do so alone. Let them flow and release them from within so you can move on.
Of course, the counting method is also effective. When we manage to halt the avalanche from one emotion to another, we can protect ourselves from unnecessary mistakes.
Pay Attention to Your Emotions
Do not overlook what you feel. Instead, acknowledge your emotions, but don’t unleash them in the wrong direction. Keep them to yourself while having an honest dialogue within.
Learning to control ourselves is a lifelong journey. Some people manage to master this control earlier, while others need more time. The fact remains that we are all human and inherently different. However, once we learn to govern our emotions, we unlock something truly wonderful: the ability to live fully.
Take a moment to reflect on how many things have gone wrong simply because you were overly emotional.
We must strive to manage our internal experiences because everything else often falls into the category of the uncontrollable. Most importantly, we should give ourselves that chance.
Written with all my heart!