Queens Are Not Born, They Become
When I was a little girl, I believed in fairy tales about Princes and Princesses, about a wonderful life in enchanted castles. I imagined vast gardens and colorful fountains, filled with love and eternal dances. I wanted to believe that such a life existed, that my life would be exactly that. That I would be someone’s Princess, and then a queen, and everything would always be wonderful.
Yes, that’s right! I wished things were like that. Maybe, if I hadn’t been so wild, I would have been locked away in some castle with a Prince. Hopefully I haven’t because I live.
Now, with 44 years of experience behind me, I boldly change the title from Princess to Queen. It didn’t take me long to understand what being a Queen truly means. While there are Queens who inherit their titles, I’m talking about those Queens from fairy tales. If I had to compare myself to one, I would say that in my younger years, I was a rebellious Princess. However, now I am a happy Queen.
The Queens who truly become such are valuable women. They fall, yet always rise again and see opportunities. They don’t give up. They don’t succumb to despair. Value their time and know what they want. Those are the Queens I’m talking about. Each of us can be like that. We can possess our own castles and domains. But let’s not forget that what we cannot own but must earn is our King.
Don’t get me wrong—I’m not talking about gold diggers. I respect their choices and know they find happiness in their own way. I speak of values in a different sense. It’s about finding and being able to hold on to the person who is truly right for you.
In Search of the King
My family has always stayed incredibly close-knit. We shared a beautiful bond. My parents consistently displayed respect for one another and demonstrated their love. Of course, I didn’t live in a fairy-tale bubble. They faced their share of struggles and setbacks in their relationship, but the dominant memory I hold onto is their love. I grew up believing that one day, I would create a similar family with my own King in our kingdom.
During my life path, throughout various stages of it and different relationships, I often found myself back at the starting line—searching for the King.
If any of you think you should wait to be found, you’re gravely mistaken. You shouldn’t waste time waiting around. Instead, if you’re reading this and haven’t yet found your King—or if he hasn’t discovered you—then it’s time to activate your “searching mode” immediately.
How?
Simply open your eyes and, most importantly, your mind. Choose your surroundings and the people you engage with wisely. The environment you choose and the company you keep influence the kind of person who will be by your side. Why does this matter? Because when you start a relationship, especially in love, you tend to accept most things about the other person. You might even adjust when you change parts of yourself in the process. But therein lies the problem. Understanding the person beside you differs vastly from the common idea of making compromises.
If you find yourself with someone who doesn’t align with your personality, you run a high risk of losing yourself in the process and wasting time trying to adapt, only to realize later that this relationship isn’t meant for you. Many of us make this mistake, and I’m sure we’ve all experienced it at least once.
So, go out, engage with people who resonate with you. Nowadays, countless alternative ways exist to connect with someone and even get to know them before a physical meeting. I’m referring to all those dating apps. I sincerely thank Bible, which led me to my King. Oh yes, I was quite skeptical at first, but it turned out to be an excellent option for busy people who don’t have time for “blind” dates. So, grab an app, check its reliability, set your criteria, and take action!
Important!
You must not give up. Trust me – I have faced my share of disappointments. It’s impossible to avoid them unless we are incredibly fortunate to meet our King early in our life journey. I remember a time when I thought that perhaps some women are simply meant to be alone—self-sufficient.
This idea crossed my mind during the period when my kid was born and I found myself alone. Yes, back then, I took a break—if I can call it that—from anything resembling relationships or romantic thoughts. It’s not that I didn’t have men around me. I simply couldn’t see them because I didn’t want to. I had tuned in to different frequencies.
However, as time continued to pass, a realization dawned on me. Clinging to my child would yield no benefits for either of us. Yes, I am self-sufficient, and this fact often hindered my journey toward self-development. You see, such Queens seek Kings who have mastered themselves—men who are intelligent and can teach you something valuable. These are the kings who consistently capture your attention, because they embody interest and depth.
Naturally, a King like that must prioritize independence and self-reliance. When you encounter such a King, you should instantly recognize—from the way he carries himself—that he can take care of himself. Now, I have found my King, and I burn with the desire to care for him. He brings me immense happiness and offers experiences that make me wonder if most people ever get to feel such joy!
How Did I Find My King?
First, I gathered the courage to create a profile on Bumble, as I mentioned earlier. Naturally, I set my criteria, and one feature I truly appreciate about this app is that even if you match with someone, you have to initiate the conversation first for them to message you at all.
Now, to be honest, I went on a few dates that felt utterly doomed the moment I met the person face-to-face. There simply wasn’t a click! As I’ve already shared, I didn’t give up. I kept doing it forward. It wasn’t my only goal. I just slowly liked a few profiles here and there—truth be told, very few. I tend to be picky.
Then one day, while I sat in my office at the job I was about to leave, with a bit of time left before a wonderful month of vacation began, I spotted him. He looked intriguing, and his straightforward and open self-presentation captured my attention. There was a delightful aura in his photos. He had specific interests that matched mine, and the strangest part was that this person was currently in Bulgaria.
Let me clarify—I live in Sofia, the capital of Bulgaria. This app shows where you’re from, but it also indicates your current location without pinpointing your exact address, of course. After all, we all need a bit of safety. It was obvious he wasn’t Bulgarian—his name, his appearance, and the place he claimed to live all pointed to that.
You Have a Match!
But after I made my choice, suddenly the notification popped up—“You have a match!” I found myself in a rather chaotic phase. I had just quit my job, was contemplating my next steps, and my child was enjoying the summer with their grandparents. Consequently, I wasn’t entirely focused on going out on dates. Still, I decided to reach out to him. As he mentioned, it’s crucial for the woman to kick off the conversation to get things started. So, I quickly typed a couple of lines: “Hi, I’m writing to initiate our conversation. I’d like to chat later.”
A little while later, we exchanged a few messages and agreed to have a phone call. I was out walking my dog when he called me. We ended up talking for quite some time, and it quickly became clear that he was in Arbanasi. As I said I was in a really strange moment in my life and decided to go meet him. Of course, a googled him (sorry babe) before going and said to one of my closest people where I am going.
Here you can read about this meeting. And yes! It was a click. This is exactly why that physical connection matters so much. I’m grateful to myself for getting in the car and making the effort to meet with him, and I’m thankful to the Universe for intertwining our paths.
A Year After Meeting the King
I found him—my King, and he is truly unique! Now, a year has passed since that first meeting filled with so many wonderful moments, and we have created even more beautiful memories together. Every time I attempt to describe what I feel just by seeing him, I realize that words always fall short. It’s a magnificent blend of excitement, indescribable joy, and tranquility. I adore him!
The moment our eyes meet holds such power that everything else swirls into a rich stream of the most wonderful emotions. When I’m with him, I feel as if I’m floating above the ground. He definitky has the most beautiful mind and hands, the details for his other parts I will keep for me.
When I look at him, I escape to another realm where nothing else matters except this moment. The scent of him transports me back to that beautiful place that belongs to us. Even simply watching and listening to him impacts me so profoundly that I can feel his strength flowing into me, grounding me even more.
It’s truly unique!
Even as I write these words, I find myself smiling once again. And it’s not just a smile on my face. Every part of my being is smiling. Yes, for now, we’ve chosen to live in different places. Each of us has our own life, yet we also share a common one.
With each passing day, I understand more clearly and tangibly that this is my person, my King! He is the one I’ve wanted all along, someone I feel I’ve known since the beginning of my life.
You might think it’s easier this way, not living under the same roof. However, I don’t believe that’s the key. There are definitely many moments when I long to hug him and feel his presence physically, but I don’t dwell on that. Instead, I focus on the moments we share together. In fact, that’s the essence of it all—building around the beautiful moments we create.
When we are together, the intimacy we share surpasses everything I’ve ever experienced, heard, or read! Looking into the eyes of your King during the most intimate moments and experiencing the profound connections that grow deeper with each encounter is simply extraordinary.
Yes, I am talking about sex, but it’s filled with love and sharing. It’s not just mechanical movement; it involves extended sessions lasting so long that I can boldly compare to the deepest, longest meditations. And when I am saying long – trust me it’s really long time of sharing pleasure.
But I’ll save that part for my next post because it truly deserves to be shared. So, stay tuned for more on this topc as it will be continued in my next posts.
You can be whatever you want in life – the choices are entirely yours
Ladies, be Princesses, be Queens! We become those when we genuinely desire it. Each of us holds the potential to become whatever we wish. Everything lies within our hands, and it fundamentally depends on us. So, seek your King, and if you have already found him, ensure he feels his best with you. This way, you can both savor each other and experience happiness for as long as fate allows.
Remember, no one owns no one and no one can forcefully hold another. The only possession we truly have is ourselves. Therefore, if something brings us joy, it only makes sense to embrace it and strive to enjoy it for as long as possible.
Before i used to call myself a single Mom, now I can call myself A mother with a lover – sounds better, isn’t it?
Written with passion and love by Vesela G.
All pictures used here possesed to Vesela Gaydardzhieva and have reserved rights. Can’t be used for any other purpose without my permission.